Saturday, June 4, 2011

For parents only...encouragement to not "go it alone"

FOR PARENTS ONLY: 
Over the next three weeks, we are talking to your student about the importance of community & to be in service to others. What that means is simply this—we need other people. God never meant for us to go through this life alone. There are times when each one of us knows that very well, and then there are other times when it’s the last thing on our minds. Wherever you are at, you need other people. And they need you. It’s part of how we see God in action in our world. It’s also how we learn more about Him and ourselves. So as we kick off this series and begin or SUMMER OF SERVICE, I thought you might appreciated the thought represented in the article below.  
Recently, I ran across the following article from Carey Nieuwhof, the Senior Pastor of Connexus Church in Canada. It’s a very candid confession, and one that may reflect your story at some point in your life. 
FIND A FRIEND 
By Carey Nieuwhof
By default over the years, I have been a pretty private person. I handle most things pretty tightly. I don't have a lot of people who are close to me, but those who are close to me are people I trust implicitly and establish a deep loyalty to.
When I was going through a tough season a few years ago, I went to see some Christian counselors, and their helpful message was simply this—I couldn't go through this alone. Everything inside me said, "Yes, I can," but I realized they were right. I couldn't do it alone.
I remember the night I shared what I was going through with my community group at the time. I'm sure my pride had kept me from talking about it before. Plus, I had earlier been convinced I would just wake up out of this at some point and it would go away. I didn't need to tell anyone. Clearly, that strategy was failing. So I talked to our community group through some tears one night. The love, prayer, empathy and compassion that poured forth was huge. I was humbled and blown away.
Toni, my wife, continues to show an unbelievable kindness. And I have a handful of close friends near and far (some live a long way away), some colleagues and some staffers who tracked with me through this season. I am so grateful for them.
Friendship is still not easy for me. I am really quite private at my core. In this networked world, I know thousands of people by name, but if people get too close, I can still push away. I'm working on that. God's working on that. There has been some big progress on that, I think.
But what I want to say is that I have come to realize that you can't do it alone. We are social beings. We are meant to be together.
I am always surprised that when I sit down with someone to talk through a life situation they are going through, and I ask them "Who else do you talk to this about?", the #1 answer is "No one," That breaks my heart.
If you're going through a hard time, find a friend. Talk to them. Pray with them. For me, it was hard, but life giving, to include a handful of people in a circle. It was life giving to see a group of people in my community group care deeply. We can’t do this alone—and we were never meant to do it that way. 
If you have not found your way into a community group at Hillside yet, please note that most of our current groups will be taking a summer break and we are looking to launch new groups this fall.  So begin now to open a time in your weekly schedule for next fall so that you can join into a community that will enhance your life journey and hopefully deepen your walk with Christ.  Your commitment to opening a time and opportunity to join a community group and your own spiritual development will be worth it.

If you have any questions about Community Groups at Hillside for adults contact Pastor Steve Pridemore (steve@hillsidemarin.org) or for children and youth, contact me (terri@hillsidemarin.org).

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